I stepped outside, dressed for a morning run, tank top on, arms bare. I squinched my eyes closed and took a deep breath of warm air, knowing the days temperature was forecast to reach 89 degrees. I opened my eyes and sort of shook my head out of my pre-coffee sleepy brain fog and looked again. The trees have leaves turning yellow and red and brown and more and more leaves are hitting the ground. Pumpkin Spice Lattes are in full swing at Starbucks. My mom friends are clamoring for boots and jeans and flannel. We are several weeks into our kids’ fall soccer seasons. Back to School Night is in the rear view mirror. It’s nearly October. Halloween costumes have already, incredibly, come and gone from the aisles in Costco…evidently they are now fully committed to hitting their Christmas stride. ? Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the kids are running around in shorts and just took a dip in the pool yesterday.
I felt a little like Brutus who’d been knocked sideways by Popeye, his eyes rolling like the wheels in a casino slot machine spinning fast: a ☀️, a ?, and a ❄️ over and over and over and it just lands on ✨X X✨ while the little yellow birds chirp and tweet in a circle around my head. Total Knock Out. Whaaaat is happening. Mother Nature is starting to play dress up in fancy colorful foliage while she’s simultaneously still blasting her Sahara sunshine on us and the markets are leaning in close to whisper in her ear that snow and reindeer are on their way. Winter is coming. But. Let’s be real for a sec here. What’s really going on, Mama N? Come here, girlfriend. Are you upset about something? Climate change got you down? Are you trying to prove your heat game is still strong after a relatively cool summer? Is your eons-old circadian rhythm telling you it’s time to turn the leaves’ colors even though you’re not emotionally ready to let the warmth go? Tell me how you really feel. This is a safe place, Mother Natch. Go ahead. Unload. Let us in.
It made me think about how similar Mother Nature’s inner struggles are to each one of us. A few recent scenarios highlighted for me that people are not necessarily always what they seem…things may appear one way, but we haven’t a clue what’s happening inside their hearts and behind closed doors.
A few weeks ago, I had met someone for the first time and was very appreciative for all the great work we knew she had been doing for our child. She was incredibly grateful for the kind words because here she had just lost a parent and she had been wondering within if she had lost her touch since she hadn’t fully regained her footing in her life or her work.
Friends and family and strangers and neighbors and acquaintances and the guy behind you in line at the grocery store and the barista in your local coffee shop and your yoga instructor and the guy from the dry cleaners and the lady beside you in the restaurant…people in all of our circles in life…here we all are, doing our best to exist in this world. Smiling. Cranky. Laughing. Silent. That may very well be the whole story. Or it may be an attempt to hide or distract or cover up or fake it till ya make it.
What we may not know is that they’ve just gotten word that their spouse needs to have surgery. Their child is dealing with an incredible illness. Their parent has gotten difficult news about their health.
They are feeling lonely. Overwhelmed. Exhausted. Scared. Sad. Disappointed. Undervalued. Ill. Or downright bursting with joy…but can’t show it because someone they love is hurting.
They are in pain every day but won’t go to the doctor…because they are stubborn. Or scared. Or the last time they went to the doctor someone they loved died and it’s too much to bear. Or they finally just went to the doctor and she just delivered to them news that they never expected to hear or never dreamed of receiving.
Their best friend is fighting for their marriage. Or contemplating divorce. Or someone else somewhere is falling in love….with Mr. Right, the wrong guy, the right guy, right in front of your eyes.
Their children are navigating tricky social situations of varying magnitude. Our kids are left out, bullied, or crushing life as a well-adjusted student-athlete.
They received an award. A raise. They were snubbed and overlooked despite hard work and hours and devotion.
Family drama. Past wounds that have never healed. Jealousy. Pride. Feelings of inadequacy. Sibling rivalry.
Its a never-ending list, really, and these are just a few of a million things going on inside of a billion peoples’ skulls. But the main thing is that these are common themes, experienced by most everyone we meet. This means…we are not alone. It’s all okay. We all need to do our best to *see* people. Meet them wherever they are. And give each other the benefit of the doubt when they’ve forgotten to text back or reacted strongly to something you’ve said or missed an opportunity to wish you well before your big event.
I find it best to give hugs freely and ask questions often. It’s not up to us to automatically know everything going on in our dearests’ minds. But it sure is nice to ask and be asked. And knowing what you know about your people, provide space or coffee or wine or a favorite candy or babysitting or a seat at your kitchen table with listening ears and a helpful heart. Apparently at my table right now, wearing sunglasses, seated beside an *iced* pumpkin spiced latte, and accessorized in her colorful autumnal wardrobe is: our Dear Mother Nature! Maybe she looks conflicted…but let’s give her the benefit of the doubt, maybe she just had a little spat with Father Winter about how much he just spent on the new snowblower. Sooooo gotta run…. be kind out there and I trust that fall will arrive in due time. ❤️
Care to share your thoughts?